To Katelyn M. Friesen

I love you so much Katelyn. I really don't know what else to say to you. I have always admired your beauty and kindness. You told me once that the purpose of your life was to love. You accomplished that goal. Your love, kindness, and generosity has touched many lives. It will not be forgotten. I will miss you so much Katelyn.

Mixed Emotions

I guess I should at least do an update on my life. I was at camp last week and it was pretty good. I have mixed feelings about that place. I love being there and the memories that I have made there but I always dread going back. It may be partly because I know I have to counsel and I really don't want to. I actually don't even like kids very much. I also don't really like being around people. So I have really know idea why I am at camp.
I am taking swimming lessons this week. I like them a little, but just a little. Yesterday I did 17 laps in just under ten minutes and the next fastest person did 13 so I was quite happy about that. But then today I was the third out of four people. But I will make the excuse that I almost broke my neck. I am defiantly feeling a little pain in that area right now but who wouldn't when you swim full force into a wall? The more I think of it the more it hurts so maybe it's all in my head. Who knows?
This evening I have felt very depressed. I am not sure why. I have also felt very tired even though all I have been doing these past few days is resting. I was visiting camp tonight and felt many things. Envy of the people there having so much fun. Jealously of some very beautiful girls. Sadness that I am not as good friends with some people. Loneliness. Anger. Grumpiness. So, if anyone wants...I am in desperate need of some prayer. Prayer that I will get rested up for camp the next three weeks. Prayer that I will be filled with peace.

What Are You Going to Do Now?

What am I going to do now. That is the question of the day isn't it? I understand why people ask the question, I do it to. People are curious about other peoples plans. Well, my plans are still very undecided. I have the whole world ahead of me and I cannot decide what I want to do. I am going to camp in a few days and after camp...I have no idea what is going to happen. That is a little scary. And I understand that God is trying to teach me to rely on Him but sitting around here doing nothing to plan ahead is obviously not wise. So, what to do? Do I move to the city and find a job and hopefully find what I am supposed to do? Or do I go to Bible college learn more about myself and God that way? Or do I find a short or maybe even long term mission? Or perhaps there is something even more out there. I mean, whatever happened to the makeup school? Or Capernwray in Europe? Or Missions trip with Rob Linsted? With all of these options, how do I know which one to chose? How do I know where to go?